Saturday, December 17, 2005

The Art of Bachelorhood


Here's just a glimps of my life as a bachelor. Someone pointed out to me the other day that it seems the only people who really read and comment on my blog are women...hmmmm. Anyways, I knew this picture would be appauling to most of you so I posted it. You see, as a bachelor there are some things I just don't care about. The beauty of being single and living alone is that it doesn't really matter what I do (or don't do, like take out the trash). This picture actually provides lots of information about me: I like Gatorade, I buy generic breakfast cereal (for dinner), Hotpockets (also for dinner), small cartons of milk (which usually spoil before I use them), and I recently received a UPS package (I don't remember what it was). Any bachelor will tell you that the art of "trash configuration" is an important one. I owe much of it to my years of playing Tetris. One crucial key to this art: notice the sturdy papers coming out of the right side of the trash can - these provide the support needed to hold extra items OUTSIDE of the trash can, literally buying me days that I can stall taking the trash out. Now, let's sing to the tune of the Hokey-Pokey, "You put the sturdy paper in ... and you let the sides hang out ... you put the bottles on top ... so you don't have to take it out...." There you go - that's me (sorry mom).

4 comments:

Ruth said...

Um, wow. Impressive trash analysis. Just please tell me you're not a dumpster diver.

It occurs to me that you could very well be the perfect candidate for "Clean Sweep."

blahblblblblblblbl said...

Your information is quite helpful in understanding why my husband actually lets the trash look just like yours. And also the dirty laundry basket. I guess I should just be glad his dirty clothes make it to the basket!

Ruth said...

I meant to ask you: when you say you thought the picture would be "appauling," did you mean appEALing, or appALLing? ;-) I mean depending on who reads this blog it could really go either way I suppose...

EjucatedGuy said...

well, thanks for your comments. I'm glad I can help women everywhere understand men and bachelors a little bit better (and yes Ruth, I meant Appalling!)