Home Fashions from Publishers Clearing House

For those of you that have high self esteem, you can now purchase the Butt Face towel available from your friends at Publishers Clearing House. Yep, it's just a reminder every morning of the ridicule and harsh words your elementary classmates threw your way growing up. Order now and receive the Jack Ass wash rag set, plus the I'm A Huge Tool shower curtain.  Your whole bathroom can gleam of insults and your morning routine in the bathroom will change the way you look at your day, and yourself!

Guaranteed to lower confidence, spur depression, and send you in a downward spiral, all before your morning cup of coffee!

Lather, Rinse, and Stop

I don't know why I decided to read the directions on my Gillette shampoo in the shower this morning because I'm pretty familiar on how to wash my hair. But I'm glad they understand me:

DIRECTIONS: Lather, rinse, and get on with your day.