Monday, October 29, 2007

Wanna Treat?!? It's still warm...

I just spent the last 8 days dogsitting my parents two dogs. I don't know why I don't have a dog...oh..wait...I remember. Because I don't enjoy picking up steaming hot dog poop with my hand wrapped around Tuesday's blue newspaper bag. Notice, I didn't say Sunday's bag. That's because the Sunday paper is stuffed with ads and that Parade Magazine that no one reads. All that extra weight usually results in the paper hitting the porch a little harder at 4AM on Sunday morning when the unemployed Intel worker delivers my paper. The force of his anger and the extra weight of the paper usually rips a hole in the corner of the Sunday bag and that makes for poor protection of my hands 30 seconds after the dogs have pinched off a fresh one in the neighbors yard. Although, even after a short week of this delightful duty, I started learning other tricks to save time and the feeling of repulsiveness of picking up Pedigree biproducts. For instance, if you carry a bag along with you while you walk the dogs and throw some rocks in it, then bend down and grab a handful of grass directly next to the target, the neighbors think you're cleaning it up. Also, I was a little confused what to do with the bags full of poop? Is it okay to just throw those away in the Bestway dumpster? I hope so. Sorry Bestway...oh, and sorry to the neighbors who's yard I left poop in and just pulled some of their grass out.

5 comments:

Ruth said...

Cats are much cleaner.

Toby L Lorenc said...

Cats are not an option....because they suck.

Kelsey Donahue said...

Ha ha...cat's DO suck! And this is precisely why I don't have a dog either!

Stefanie said...

The grass-grab/rock decoy trick! Classic! I am totally using this.

Toby, thank you for teaching me the something new I learned today. I was getting nervous. It's almost 8pm and I hadn't found the thing yet.

Becky said...

Here's a suggestion for ya. Use a grocery bag. They much thicker than a newpaper bag and therefore, much sturdier. Plus, they have twice the circumference. Depending on the size of the dog, the bag thickness and circumference are very important.

As far as disposal, I usually just dump it in the nearest trash can and then saunter away as nonchalantly as possible. This usually ends up being some random person who's not yet pulled their trash in from the morning trash pick up. But better in their trash than left on their lawn, right? :)