The World of Chick-Fil-A

There's nothing like waking up and heading to Chick-fil-a for breakfast in Colorado Springs (well, except on Sunday). I love CFA, even after being a previous employee.  Yep, total nerd Toby worked there with his calculator watch and thick, gold framed eyeglasses days. It totally beat my Chuck E Cheese days, but that's another story.
The CFA experience just makes me laugh sometimes.  It always catches me off guard when then say, "My pleasure."  Sometime, I just want to respond, "Well, thanks for pleasuring me" and see their reaction.
The drive thru is also comical to me.  I guess it's efficient (unlike Wendy's), but I always crack up when I see the employees awkwardly walking, then running, then slowing down, then jogging next to the car windows in the drive-thru line all while taking the customers' orders. Then, quickly calling the order into their fancy little headsets and moving along to the next car.  I never know what to do - drive slow? Stop? Speed up really quickly and see if they can catch up? I don't have the best driving record, so I'm a bit concerned I'll take one of them out with my car someday.
That's why I usually venture inside, were I'll have table service with drink refills every 10 minutes and over eager employees taking away my tray before I've scooped up that last glob of ketchup with my remaining fry. I have to say, it's nice that they're attentive, but sometimes I go for fast food because I want to be left alone! I don't know - I'm hard to please I guess.
Anyway, there's no point to this story other than my rantings.

Handyman Connection: A fulfilling weekend of pain and dead things

My time in the crawl space this weekend was a time to take deep breaths of asbestos, meditate on things I'd rather be doing, and practice hot yoga as I squatted in weird positions and twisted my body to access hard to reach pipes and vents.  I also: practiced pain management as I snagged my arms on nails, tested my body's resilience to poison as I endured spider bites, and had the opportunity to use my anger management skills as I tried to reconnect a dryer vent. I opened my eyes to a whole new world of nature - leaves, twigs, lint, and other debris that was filling the dryer vent which I had to empty out before reattaching it.  Sadly, I also had to witness the cycles of life on both ends of the spectrum, as I knocked down newly formed spiders nests filled with tiny eggs to cleaning up mice carcasses filled with maggots. Man, I'm lucky to have a life full of such amazing experiences.

If I were made of clay

Yep, I've created myself as a clay figure, thanks to Hotels.com.  You should go try it too.

I made my mouth extremely large because, if you don't know me, it is extremely large.  I can fit the top of a pop can between my teeth. I'm still searching for a photograph to compare to this one so you can see that I'm serious.

Well, I guess that's about the extent of the excitement in my life right now. 

Bye.

Dear Taco Bell

Dear Taco Bell,
What happened today was a mistake. I knew I should have stopped earlier, but I just kept going. It's so hard for me, after all these years. I think I loved you once, but you've changed.

Over the past 10 years, you've hurt me many times and left me begging on my knees for the pain to stop. I knew I couldn't go on like that, so I made a decision to not come back to you. But after a while, I started wondering "what would it be like now." I thought maybe things had changed.

I heard about some new things you were working on and it sounded like you were doing well. The $5 box lured me in, only to find out you had stuffed it with things that would end up hurting me again.

I think it's best if we part ways and never cross paths again. I want to love you, but you insist on hurting me and bringing up what we just finished. My heart says yes, but my body says no. I have to trust my gut on this one and call it quits.

I'm ready for a new chapter in my life. I didn't want to tell you this, but I've been seeing Wendy lately. She just offers me things I can't get from you. Anyway, I'm sure you're not interested in hearing about that.

Tell Cinnamon Twist I said hi.

ejucatedguy


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Dear Wendy's Sandwich Makers
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Dear Friends
Dear Massage Therapist

I saw your Facebook post

Yes, I saw your cry for attention disguised as a Facebook post, I just chose not to comment.